"come, come," I hear it calling me

[headedforhope]

Characters: headedforhope, gentlecuteside, revolutionized, waha
Date: 2/14~ and onward, spanning the length of the event.
Summary: The magic of the Gardens draws Mami to each of these three girls in turn, and them to her, keeping the pair locked together until both reveal something to the other.
Warnings: Should be nothing, will edit if anything comes up.

[Mami is no stranger to the feeling of her heart fluttering in her chest, the sensation of being tugged by the fragile strings toward another. She's also no stranger to resisting it and making the lessening of distance a slow and cautious thing, if she allows it to happen at all. Gradual, like some intricate, orbiting dance of light footsteps and restrained movements.

The magic at play affords her that much, at least, but no amount of digging in her heels and shoving away the feeling of being pulled can stop the inevitable from happening.]

Comments

[gentlecuteside]

Yes, I...I appreciate you being there for me. It was good to have someone to share the details with. You were very helpful to me.

[headedforhope]

Ehehe, really? Then I'm content, knowing that I could be of use to you.

[....oh, but that sounds so...clinical. It sounds cold, and Mami's brows furrow slightly as she searches for a better turn of phrase. She's come a long way, but some nuances of emotional intimacy still tend to slip through her fingers.]

Ah, that is - ....I'm glad we became friends.

[gentlecuteside]

I...I am too.

[But her face flickers a little. Yep, friends...and they won't be anything else.]

You have been a really good friend to me. I wish I could have met you before coming here, to be honest.

[headedforhope]

Really?

[She thinks that over, tries to imagine it.....compares how she is now to how she was then. Mami smiles in a rueful sort of way.]

Heh, I'm not sure if I can agree. I don't think you would have liked me very much.

[gentlecuteside]

Really?

[She found that a little surprising.]

Why not?

[headedforhope]

I was a different person then. [She idly sproings one of her curls, a slow and thoughtful gesture.] On the surface, I acted much the same as I do now, but.....mm.

[Mami goes quiet, marshaling her thoughts. It's important, here, to not simply take the voice of her self-hatred for the gospel truth. That's a habit she's spent too long trying to break to be able to afford indulging it now.]

I guess...I was rather foolish. I was so afraid of rejection that I never let others in close, even when being alone was so painful. I thought that if I isolated myself, I wouldn't have my hopes shot down. ...but running away didn't do me any good. I just felt that terrible loneliness. Even so, I felt stuck in place - always distancing myself, unable to move forward.

[She speaks in calm, measured tones as she gazes off into the scenery, neither asking for pity nor seeking understanding.]

I'm still trying to change, you know. I don't want to be a girl that can only cry by herself - I want to connect to others, and like myself, and....and be happy.

[gentlecuteside]

I...understand very well. You sound a lot like I did.

[She chuckles.]

Remember when we first met? Good grief, so much posturing.

[headedforhope]

[She also laughs, a quiet and rueful sound.]

Ah, yes. I don't think I ever properly apologized for my part in that.

[gentlecuteside]

[She dismisses that with a wave.]

No need. That was on both of us. I was...well, it was soon after we'd arrived, and I felt...I wasn't in the best place when I got pulled here, and I felt...isolated...no, alone, and...gah, I can't think of the right words. It just won't come out right. I'm sorry.

[headedforhope]

[Mami shakes her head slowly.]

No, it's all right - you don't need to apologize. I understand. [a pause, and she admits:] I was the same way beneath it all. Alone....even angry, and much else.

[Mami becomes subdued then, her smile a little sad.] To be honest, I think I took those painful feelings on others as well as yourself. I'm glad I'm no longer that sort of person. [she glances around and adds in a thoughtful sort of voice:] I guess I owe the Queen my thanks for that, in part. If I had never been brought here, I wouldn't have met you or any of my other friends - and I'd have never changed for the better.

[gentlecuteside]

In a strange way we both owe the Queen a great deal. She is a surprisingly helpful host for a supernatural kidnapper.

[headedforhope]

Seems so, huh? Funny....it used to be that I couldn't imagine feeling anything other than anger when it came to her. Or perhaps pity.

[gentlecuteside]

Well, of the two supernatural kidnappers I have experience with, she's certainly the friendlier of the two.

[headedforhope]

[A wince, only partly theatrical.]

Geez, putting it that way, I don't have much to complain about. I've been through some strange things, but supernatural kidnapping has only happened once.

[gentlecuteside]

Well, in a way I suppose to should be grateful to kidnapper number one as well. If it wasn't for her, I would probably be dead now, and Tokyo destroyed.

[headedforhope]

[Mami sobers at that, becomes reflective and quiet. At last, she responds:]

Sometimes it overwhelms me, thinking about everything that might have or might not have been if this place didn't exist....or if certain things in my own world had or had not happened. Mere chance, or powers beyond our control or understanding or awareness, are responsible for so much of our fates......

[gentlecuteside]

There's no point in thinking about things you can't control, like that. Things are what they are, and pondering what-ifs is a waste of time and concentration.

[headedforhope]

[Mami concedes that with a nod, but doesn't relinquish her stance.]

I can't deny that's true. Maybe it makes me a fool to do it anyway - I can accept that. Mm....wouldn't be the first mistake I've made.

[Then Mami seems to consider something, and there's a certain hesitance in the way she glances at the other girl.]

Hey, Amamiya-san?

[gentlecuteside]

Hmm? What is it, Mami-san?

[headedforhope]

It occurs to me that I know quite a bit about you - ah, like your powers, and your story....but you don't really know much about me, huh?

[She grows almost somber as she responds, thumbing the gem of her ring...the jewel that houses her very soul.]

I didn't really think about it much at first, but that doesn't seem right.

[gentlecuteside]

Oh! Well...you don't need to talk about it if you don't want. I don't mind, really.

[headedforhope]

[That does give Mami pause, but then she shakes her head - and the light tugging sensation in her heart seems to ease, as if agreeing with her choice.]

No, it's fine. Ah.... [Mami looks down at her ring. She forces the twisting and nervous motion of her fingers to stop in favor of cupping her palms. There's a soft flash of light, and her Soul Gem materializes; the golden glow free of taint or corruption.] ...I wanted to show you this.

[gentlecuteside]

[Amamiya leans in closer for a better look, her eyes poring over the brilliant surface.]

It's beautiful. But what is it?

[headedforhope]

It's what marks me as a magical girl. It's the source of my power, Amamiya-san, and...

[She pauses again, the light flush in her cheeks that the other girl's compliment had provoked fading fast. Mami's smile dims.] ...it's my very soul, to be honest, housed not in my body but in this gem. [Her pale, elegant fingers crook forward in a protective curl. Mami's voice drops.]

If it gets broken, or thrown away, I'll die. And if it becomes completely corrupted....I'll become a monster.

[A soft, fragile sort of chuckle. It pains her to be this honest, and yet to shy away would just be cowardly. Amamiya trusted Mami with her secrets; now it's time for the favor to be returned.]

I don't suppose you still think it's beautiful now, huh?

[gentlecuteside]

Oh!

[She looks rather surprised by that.]

But why? Isn't that dangerous?